Chapter 3

Victoria had her arm around Julian's waist when I got there.

I pulled them apart.

"So this is what staying late at the office looks like?" I turned on Julian. "Arms around her in front of everyone?"

Victoria took my arm, her voice soft. "Pearl, don't — I'd had a bit too much to drink, it's my fault—"

I pulled free. "Don't touch me. You knew exactly what you were doing."

She gave a small yelp and stumbled back — though I'd barely touched her — and sat down heavily on the floor.

"Pearl." Julian's voice went cold. He moved past me to help Victoria up, checking she was all right. His back was to me.

I'd caught the corner of a table when he shoved through. I stood there, the pain sharp in my side, and watched him tend to her.

Victoria's eyes filled. She looked at him, trembling.

"It's my fault. Please don't fight because of me—"

"It's nothing to do with you." Julian turned to me. Flat. "I've explained this to you more times than I can count. Victoria's mother asked me to look after her before she died. She's alone, she's struggling — and you call her names, you accuse her, you make everyone's life worse. Are you proud of yourself?"

He looked at me with something close to contempt.

"Don't make me regret marrying you."

The room seemed to tilt slightly.

Don't make me regret marrying you.

I stood there for a moment, and all the things I'd wanted to say — you're my husband, she's been provoking me for months, you heard her on the phone yourself — they wouldn't come out.

What came out instead was: "Then let's get divorced."

The moment I said it, I felt something unclench.

Julian made a sound like it was ridiculous. "Is that all you've got? Always threatening divorce when you run out of arguments."

He put his arm around Victoria and walked her out.

I stayed at the gala for another hour without moving from my seat.

I hadn't told anyone, but I'd been unwell for several weeks — tired, odd, missing things. When I got home that night, I discovered why.

I miscarried in the bathroom while Lily slept.

Our second child, who had arrived without us knowing and left the same way.

A week later, Julian and I filed the paperwork.

Lily came with me.