Chapter 4

I had no idea why Dorian would want to see me now.

A row of pear trees lined the path through the grounds. He was standing in the middle of it. I had no way around him.

I gave him the respectful nod due an Alpha.

He looked me over for a long moment, unhurried.

Then he spoke.

"I expected you would choose me."

I didn't know what to say to that.

In this life, we'd barely crossed paths. I had once slipped him an engraved leather notebook under my brother's name, as a gift. And I had once asked my brother to take me along when he went to check on Dorian after he was hurt during training.

I had always kept my feelings quiet.

I stepped back and looked down at a fallen petal on the ground.

"You're the Alpha Heir," I said. "It wouldn't be right for me to presume."

He went silent again.

His brow came together. His mouth pressed into a line. The air around him went still in a way I recognized.

We had been Bonded for an entire lifetime. I knew what that stillness meant. He was displeased.

After a moment, he said quietly, "But you liked me before. I know you did."

"If you liked me, why did you change your mind?"

Something jumped in my chest. For one instant I thought he remembered the past life too.

But that couldn't be. His greatest wish in that life had been to be free of me. If he remembered, he would not be standing here.

When I didn't answer, he reached into his jacket and pulled out the engraved leather notebook.

"I know this was from you."

"Last spring at the Pack gathering, you kept looking at me. Not just there — at the tea gathering, the social meet. You always watched me and then looked away the moment I looked back."

The path was quiet around us, petal-covered stone stretching in both directions. He stood there with something heavy and cold around him that didn't match the season.

"You don't have to pretend you weren't interested, Ivy. I'm not stupid."

"So. Why?"

So my careful, hidden feelings hadn't been so hidden after all. They showed in my eyes even when I said nothing.

I gave him a formal bow.

"I was young and not thinking clearly. I apologize if it was obvious."

"I understand my place now. I think of you only as the Alpha Heir. Nothing more."

He stood there for a moment after that, not moving.

There were Pack members passing on the path nearby. I didn't want to drag this out. I made my excuse and left quickly.

I went home to the Calloway grounds for the first time in what felt like years.

My father and brother were still at the Pack Hall handling business. My mother had just been called to see Eleanor.

I went up to my room and sat in front of the mirror.

She looked back at me. Seventeen. Soft eyes. A trace of something unfinished still in her face.

Still young. Still enough time to start again.

I drifted off in the afternoon light.

Not long after, one of the staff knocked and said I was wanted in my father's study.

I pushed open the door. Both my parents and my brother were there.

My mother had just come back from Eleanor's and already knew what had happened at the gathering.

She told my father and brother. I heard my mother ask me, "Ivy, why didn't you choose Dorian?"

I knew what they thought of him. All of them.

My father said if I Bonded with the next Alpha King, I'd be the most powerful Luna in the territory.

My mother said Dorian was disciplined and principled. He'd be a reliable mate.

My brother praised Dorian's strength and judgment at length.

They all talked for a while, and then they all looked at me.

Light came through the window and lay across the floor.

I asked one question.

"If choosing Dorian meant the rest of my life would be miserable — would you still want me to do it?"

The room went quiet.

My father thought about it for a moment. "If that's the case, then don't do it."

"You matter more than the title. Your happiness comes first."

My mother reached over and smoothed my hair. "The Calloway Pack is already strong. We don't need to gain anything from this."

My brother stood up and smiled. "I trained to fight. I'll take care of the Pack's standing on the field. You just live the way you want, Ivy."

They didn't ask me to explain.

The afternoon sun was too bright. I had to close my eyes against it.

I thought about my past life suddenly.

In that life, I had survived ten attempts by Dorian to sever our Bond. It was only because my father had fought for me in the Pack Council, and my brother had bled on the northern borders to keep the Calloway name strong, that I managed to hold on. Without them, Dorian's contempt alone would have ended me.

My family had always been my foundation.

"That said, even if you won't choose Dorian, there's no reason to choose Cain," my father said, his brow creasing. "He's too weak. Think carefully about that."

I nodded.

Because my mother had already declined Eleanor's arrangement, and I hadn't given Dorian the signet ring, this life would be different. I wasn't going to be bound to Dorian under the pretense of a Mate Bond.

The thought let me breathe easier.

About two weeks later, the Alpha King's sister hosted a spring sports event. I went with my brother.

I remembered from my past life that Dorian hadn't attended. He was always too busy with Pack administration to care about things like this.

But this time, halfway through, I looked up and saw him sitting in the viewing area.